Bottom Shelf Mixology: The Apple Mountain

Welcome to Bottom Shelf Mixology™!  We have racked our brains (and our livers) to come up with special "bottom shelf" versions of popular drinks, and some original creations that range from "oh, that might be interesting" to "that sounds absolutely disgusting".  

The Apple Mountain(Mountain Cider High)

• 1 oz Fleischmann's Vodka
• 1 oz Store Brand Citrus-Flavored Soda
• 1 oz Great Value Sugar-Free Apple Flavored Drink (prepared)
• Ice

Start by putting ice in your shaker.  Add the vodka and apple drink.  Shake exactly six times.

Strain into your glass, and stir in the citrus soda.

Drink until you feel like you're on top of a mountain. 

Be careful though, the hangover the next morning will make it feel like you are under that same mountain.

Bottom Shelf Mixology: Danger Death Ray

Welcome to Bottom Shelf Mixology™!  We have racked our brains (and our livers) to come up with special "bottom shelf" versions of popular drinks, and some original creations that range from "oh, that might be interesting" to "that sounds absolutely disgusting".  

We are getting ready for an upcoming filming of some new Bottom Shelf episodes, so I am taking this break from RiffTrax to give you our first new recipe!

Danger Death Ray (Party Cannon)

• 2 oz Crystal Palace Vodka
• 1 oz Midori
• 1 oz 99 Bananas
• 1 Lime Popsicle (melted)
• 1/2 can Store Brand Zero Calorie Energy Drink
• 1/4 tsp Blue Curaçao
• Ice

Put your ice in the shaker, and add the vodka, Midori, 99 Bananas, and the melted popsicle.  Shake well.  Add in the energy drink and the curaçao, and gently stir.

Drink one, maybe two to get the party started and your heart rate racing.  Any more than that, and you might just feel like you were blasted by an actual death ray.  Especially the next morning.

Bottom Shelf Mixology: Love Dump

Welcome to Bottom Shelf Mixology™!  We have racked our brains (and our livers) to come up with special "bottom shelf" versions of popular drinks, and some original creations that range from "oh, that might be interesting" to "that sounds absolutely disgusting".  

Love Dump

• 1 oz Fleischmann's Vodka
• 1 oz DeKuyper Hazelnut Schnapps
• 1/8 tsp Imitation Vanilla
• 1 Fit & Active Lemonade Drink Mix Stick

Put a few cubes of ice in your shakes, and pour in the vodka and hazelnut schnapps.  Shake slowly for 13 seconds.

Open the shaker and add in the imitation vanilla.  Without shaking the mixture further, strain it out into your cup.

Shoot it back, and then eat some of the lemonade mix straight out of the tube like Pixy Stix.

The original drink is supposed to taste like chocolate cake.  This version will most likely not.  It will probably taste more like what the song Love Dump (Static-X) is about.

Bit of trivia for you:  WCW Tag Team Kronik used a version of Love Dump for their intro music.

Bottom Shelf Mixology: Whistle Tip

Welcome to Bottom Shelf Mixology™!  We have racked our brains (and our livers) to come up with special "bottom shelf" versions of popular drinks, and some original creations that range from "oh, that might be interesting" to "that sounds absolutely disgusting".  

Whistle Tip (a.k.a. Woo Woo)

• 1 oz Burnett Cranberry Vodka
• 1 oz DeKuyper Peach Schnapps
• 1 oz Cranberry Juice Cocktail
• Ice

Put the ice, vodka, schnapps, and juice into your shaker.

Shake for twenty-two seconds.

Pour into your glass.

Start the video below, and take a drink every time Bubb Rubb says "woo woo!"


You might need to prepare extra.

Bottom Shelf Mixology: The Bane

Welcome to Bottom Shelf Mixology™!  We have racked our brains (and our livers) to come up with special "bottom shelf" versions of popular drinks, and some original creations that range from "oh, that might be interesting" to "that sounds absolutely disgusting".  

The Bane (Paralyzer)

• 1 oz Crown Russe Vodka
• 1 oz Rio Grande Tequila
• 1/2 oz Sabroso Coffee Liqueur
• 2 oz Store Brand Diet Cola
• 4 Coffee Creamers
• Ice

Start with ice in your shaker.  Pour in the vodka, tequila, and coffee liqueur.  Shake.

Add in the cola, and pour into a tall glass.  Add in the creamer, and stir.

Drink these until you can't walk, or you feel the sudden urge to break some bats.

Bottom Shelf Mixology S2 Episode 17: Millennial Martini

Welcome to the Bottom Shelf Mixology™ video series!  Our staff of Mixologists have decided it would be a good idea to actually test our special "bottom shelf" recipes.  What have we done?

This one is all Andrew Leamon's fault!  He was telling me about LaCroix and it being taxed in Chicago, and how everyone was flipping out over it.  Because of this we decided to make it a drink!  I had never had LaCroix before, and I wish that was still the case. 

It's not good.

Bottom Shelf Mixology S2 Episode 15: Dark and Stormy

Welcome to the Bottom Shelf Mixology™ video series!  Our staff of Mixologists have decided it would be a good idea to actually test our special "bottom shelf" recipes.  What have we done?

Bottom Shelf Mixology S2 Episode 13: Three Wise Guys

Welcome to the Bottom Shelf Mixology™ video series!  Our staff of Mixologists have decided it would be a good idea to actually test our special "bottom shelf" recipes.  What have we done?

Have we really been doing this for a year? Yes we have!

How are we still alive?  I'm still asking myself that question after this special episode.

Bottom Shelf Mixology S2 Episode 6: Big Game Super Punch

Welcome to the Bottom Shelf Mixology™ video series!  Our staff of Mixologists have decided it would be a good idea to actually test our special "bottom shelf" recipes.  What have we done?

Football? Party? Drinking? Check out our latest episode of Bottom Shelf Mixology: Big Game Super Punch!

Bottom Shelf Mixology: Paradise Lost

Welcome to Bottom Shelf Mixology™!  Our staff of Mixologists have racked their brains (and livers) to come up with special "bottom shelf" versions of popular drinks, and some original creations that range from "oh, that might be interesting" to "that sounds absolutely disgusting".  

Paradise Lost (Paradise Mix)

• 1 oz. Crystal Palace Vodka
• 1 oz. Mr. Boston Blue Curaçao
• 1 oz. Kinky Gold
• 1 oz. Malibu Pineapple Rum
• 1 packet McDonald's Sweet And Sour Sauce
• 1 tsp. Powdered Lemonade Drink Mix
• Wint O Green Lifesavers
• Ice

Start off by adding the sweet and sour sauce to your glass.  Stir in the vodka.  Next add in the ice.  Next does the Rum, Kinky Gold, and the blue curaçao.

For the finishing touch, plunk in a handful of Wint O Green Lifesavers.

If you drink enough of these, prepare to pay the price!

For still they knew, and ought to have still remember'd
The high Injunction not to taste that Fruit,
Whoever tempted; which they not obeying,
Incurr'd, what could they less, the penaltie,
And manifold in sin, deserv'd to fall.

Bottom Shelf Mixology: Black Lagoon

Welcome to Bottom Shelf Mixology™!  We have racked our brains (and our livers) to come up with special "bottom shelf" versions of popular drinks, and some original creations that range from "oh, that might be interesting" to "that sounds absolutely disgusting".  

It's almost Halloween, and that means it's time for some spooky cocktails!

Black Lagoon (Sea Breeze)

• 1 1/2 oz Crystal Palace Vodka
• 2 oz Store Brand Cranberry Juice Cocktail
• 3 oz Faygo Grape Soda
• Ice
• Black Licorice

Put the ice in your glass.  Pour the vodka, cranberry juice cocktail, and grape soda in the glass.  It should turn a nice, dark color.

Stir with a piece of black licorice, leaving it in the glass as a garnish.

Warning: Drinking too many of these may cause delusions of being able to breathe under water.  Please, resist all urges to go swimming.

Bottom Shelf Mixology: Pop Rockstar

Welcome to Bottom Shelf Mixology™!  Our staff of Mixologists have racked their brains (and livers) to come up with special "bottom shelf" versions of popular drinks, and some original creations that range from "oh, that might be interesting" to "that sounds absolutely disgusting".  

Pop Rockstar

• 8 oz Rockstar Pure Zero Energy Drink
• 2 oz Popov Vodka
• 1 packet Green Apple Popping Candy

Pour the vodka into your glass.  Slowly pour in the energy drink.

Right before you drink it, pour in the popping candy.

Chug, pop that collar, put on your ladder shades, blow out your hair, and go party with the dudebros!

Bottom Shelf Mixology Episode 15: The Red Tide

Welcome to the Bottom Shelf Mixology™ video series!  Our staff of Mixologists have decided it would be a good idea to actually test our special "bottom shelf" recipes.  What have we done?

This week, join me, the Unpaid Intern Eric, and our guest Paul as we go ridin' the Red Tide.

And once again, we made something not terrible.


Check out the recipe for the Red Tide here.

If you like these videos, you can help us out over on Patreon.

Bottom Shelf Mixology Episode 11: Government Mule

Welcome to the Bottom Shelf Mixology™ video series!  Our staff of Mixologists have decided it would be a good idea to actually test our special "bottom shelf" recipes.  What have we done?

This weeks experiment was... good? What's going on here?

Watch us almost enjoy the Government Mule with special guest Hammer J.


You can find this recipe, along with the rest of the reviews and recipes from the Bottom Shelf, right here.

And hey, don't forget, we started a Patreon!  Support us and buy us a drink!

Bottom Shelf Mixology: Breakfast of Champions

Welcome to Bottom Shelf Mixology™!  We have racked our brains (and our livers) to come up with special "bottom shelf" versions of popular drinks, and some original creations that range from "oh, that might be interesting" to "that sounds absolutely disgusting".  

Happy Shredded Wheat Day!  To celebrate this amazing holiday, we have a new recipe for you!

Breakfast of Champions

• 1 oz Heaven Hill Vodka
• 1 oz 99 Bananas
• 1 piece Bite Size Frosted Shredded Wheat

First you will need to place the cereal piece in your glass.

Then pour in the 99 Bananas, followed by the vodka.

Let it sit for a bit, so that the cereal gets nice and soggy.  Then drink/chew right before you head out the door for work*.

It might actually help you make it through the day!

*Please don't actually do this.  You will probably get fired.

Bottom Shelf Mixology Episode 2: Almond Flümgorp

Welcome to the Bottom Shelf Mixology™ video series!  Our staff of Mixologists have decided it would be a good idea to actually test our special "bottom shelf" recipes.  What have we done?

Episode two of the Bottom Shelf Mixology series is here!  For this episode, we were joined by LinkslilTri4ce in our tasting of the absolutely disgusting Almond Flümgorp.

Bottom Shelf Mixology Episode 1: White Trash Screwdriver

Welcome to the Bottom Shelf Mixology™ video series!  Our staff of Mixologists have decided it would be a good idea to actually test our special "bottom shelf" recipes.  What have we done?

Ladies and gentlemen, we are about to embark on a new journey across the Bottom Shelf.  Last night, we got together with some friends and filmed the first four episodes of our Bottom Shelf Mixology video series.

Here without any more ado, I present to you Episode One of Bottom Shelf Mixology!


The plan is to release one episode every week until we have done all of our recipes (not including the rejected drinks), so make sure to subscribe to our YouTube channel!

Bottom Shelf Mixology: The Pantsuit

Welcome to Bottom Shelf Mixology™!  Our staff of Mixologists have racked their brains (and livers) to come up with special "bottom shelf" versions of popular drinks, and some original creations that range from "oh, that might be interesting" to "that sounds absolutely disgusting".  

As part of our celebration of Three Years on the Bottom Shelf, our staff of mixologists have started imagining some drinks for the only people we see on TV more than the Kardashians: Presidential Candidates*.

Our second candidate drink is The Pantsuit.  This is the one you drink so you aren't called sexist.

The Pantsuit (Arkansas Razorback)

• 1 oz Lady Bligh Spiced Rum
• 1 oz Congress Vodka
• 1 oz DeKuyper Amaretto
• 1 oz Sabroso Coffee Liqueur
• Ice

Put the ice in your shaker.  Pour in the coffee liqueur, vodka, and amaretto.  Finish with the Lady Bligh on top.

Shake until frothy, and pour into your glass.

Pairs nicely with a cigar.

*Please note that the drinks in this series do not necessarily reflect the political views of PBAndAwesome.com or its staff.

12 Drinks of Christmas: Baby New Year

Welcome to Bottom Shelf Mixology™!  Our staff of Mixologists have racked their brains (and livers) to come up with special "bottom shelf" versions of popular drinks, and some original creations that range from "oh, that might be interesting" to "that sounds absolutely disgusting".  

The year is wrapping up today, and with it the 12 Drinks of Christmas.  And what better way to ring in the new year than with a drink themed around Baby New Year himself: Happy.

Drink 12: Baby New Year

• 2 oz Popov Vodka
• 1 oz DeKuyper Coffee Brandy
• 1 oz Baby Formula (From a free sample pack)

Start by preparing the formula in a bottle as per the directions.

Put in some crushed ice, and pour in the vodka and brandy.

Drink from the bottle to nurse away all of your bad memories of the previous year,

Bottom Shelf Mixology Rejected NFL Drinks: AFC West

Welcome to Bottom Shelf Mixology™!  Our staff of Mixologists have racked their brains (and livers) to come up with special "bottom shelf" versions of popular drinks, and some original creations that range from "oh, that might be interesting" to "that sounds absolutely disgusting".  

Are we really starting Week 7 of the 2015 NFL season already?  It seems like just a few days ago the Lions were only at two losses for the season! 

Well, since we are on Week 7, that means the seventh part in our series on Rejected NFL Drinks.  We've been making nasty rejected drink for each team in the league and posting a division at a time.

Today, we are attacking the AFC West.