Thursday, October 22, 2015

Bottom Shelf Mixology Rejected NFL Drinks: AFC West

Welcome to Bottom Shelf Mixology!  Our staff of Mixologists have racked their brains (and livers) to come up with special "bottom shelf" versions of popular drinks, and some original creations that range from "oh, that might be interesting" to "that sounds absolutely disgusting".  

Are we really starting Week 7 of the 2015 NFL season already?  It seems like just a few days ago the Lions were only at two losses for the season! 

Well, since we are on Week 7, that means the seventh part in our series on Rejected NFL Drinks.  We've been making nasty rejected drink for each team in the league and posting a division at a time.

Today, we are attacking the AFC West.

Denver Broncos

A.k.a. Dead Horse
  • 1 oz E & J VO Brandy
  • 1 oz Diet Schweppes Ginger Ale
For this one you're going to need your trusty E-cig.

Mix the brandy and ginger ale, then load it into your E-cig.

Vape it up!

San Diego Chargers

A.k.a. Gates of Hell
  • 1 bottle El Toro Tequila
  • 1 bottle Mrs Dash Fiesta Lime Seasoning Blend
  • 1 9-volt Battery
This is just like doing normal shots of tequila, but it's lower in sodium!

You simply replace the salt with the Mrs Dash Fiesta Lime Seasoning Blend, and instead of sucking on a lime, you touch the battery to your tongue!

It's better for you, and it's exciting!

Oakland Raiders

  • 3 oz Jägermeister
  • 4 oz Camo Black Ice Beer
  • 1 Century Egg
  • Black Pepper
First, you need to open the egg.  Lightly cover it with some black pepper.

Prepare the jägerbomb with the beer.

Take a big ol' bite out of the now seasoned egg, and drink the jägerbomb.

Don't be too alarmed if you start hallucinating about Al Davis.

Kansas City Chiefs

A,k,a, Chief Salad
  • 2 oz Bacon Flavored Vodka
  • 2 oz Tomato Juice
  • 2 oz Cucumber Melon Gatorade
  • 1 Tbsp Egg Salad
  • Ranch Dressing
First, pour the vodka.  Then add the sports drink.  Next, the egg salad.  Stir it up.

Next, add in the tomato juice.  Give it another stir.

Finally, finish it off with a nice healthy squeeze from the bottle of ranch dressing.  You probably want to stir it again, too.

Drink, and then go out to paint the field.

Up next: The NFC West (the final four teams).

Previous Divisions: